During college we make friends with people who we never would have met in any other circumstance. And personally, I feel that these are the people who end up shaping you the most. You wouldn’t be who you are without these people. This week my friend from California is visiting, and I haven’t seen her in about 2 years. I’ve been so excited for the past 3 weeks, telling everyone I work with that Miss Cali is visiting and how much fun I’ll have going out with her. But then I quit Hell’s Enigma and I’m still waiting to hear back from Chi Chi and as I reviewed my finances I realized that going out was going to be very difficult. I also told her I’d drive her to see a friend of her’s from college, but when I realized that person lived 60 miles outside of Boston, not 30 it just didn’t seem plausible (not to add my maintenance required light is on and the engine is roaring like a vintage car). She told me if I was visiting her in California that she’d take me anywhere I want to go, and then eluded to me being a bad friend (actually she just said I was a bad friend, no elusion). So that made me wonder, am I a bad friend, or is it just that outside of college these types of friendships may not last forever?
With distance and the crappy economy it seems to be harder and harder to maintain long distance friendships. It’s easy to hop on the T and go visit your friend across the city, but it’s pretty difficult to get in a plane and plan a trip to visit a friend across the country. The fact that Miss Cali came out to visit is a feat in and of itself and I’m so happy she had the means and the time to come see me and my other friend from college, who we’ll call The Lawful Poet. She’s been settled into her job in California for over a year now and it seems like her financial and professional life are both in order. I’d like to think I’m in the exact opposite situation as her. While my social and academic life are finally falling into place, my financial and professional life are unsteady and unstable. This makes it very difficult for her and I to see eye to eye on everything.
Am I being a dick because I said “No” to driving her 120 miles to see one person from college? I don’t think so. If she’s coming to visit Boston then he should come to her. And besides, I lent her my car throughout college, so I do think I’m allowed to say no every once in awhile. But more importantly, because our life situations are so drastically different, can we still remain friends through the thick and thin of it all? I feel like had she visited 5 months from now, I’d be more able to spend time (and money) with her. I don’t think temporary life differences should alter the basic nature of a friendship, but all of us graduates must worry about the friends we’ll loose to time, distance, and differences in lifestyles. In talking to a friend of mine last night, she revealed to me that sometimes the people we were closest with in college drift away, while the periphery friends end up becoming some of your closest friends. I’ve noticed this happening and I have to wonder if it’s because I’m changing or the people around me are changing, or are we all changing. I’m a vastly different person than I was 2 years ago; much more of a homebody now. Is my new tendency to stay in and not spend money going to cost me friends? But aren’t most freshly graduated graduates trying to pinch their pennies? I would think that would put us all in the same boat. I don’t really know if I have a real point to make with this posting, it’s more a bunch of questions but it does feel better getting them out there. And I know I can’t be the only one that is noticing this change in friendships. Ah, what is a Nefarious Graduate to do?
On a brighter note, my interview with Chi Chi went well. I looked pretty spiffy for the interview, wearing a one shoulder blouse under a black blazer that could best be described as couture cotton candy.
The manager of the store loved what I was wearing (which is always a good sign in retail) and she said she heard good things from my previous interview and she’s going to insist the District Manager meet with me. She did mention that my classes may be problematic, as the company doesn’t love hiring people who don’t have 100% open availability. But since I’m only in class 9 hours a week and the rest is flexible, it seems like that shouldn’t be a problem.
On a side note, I was on Newbury Street with Miss Cali and The Lawful Poet and I finally bought a Johnny Cupcakes T-Shirt. I now consider myself a proper bostonian with this in my possession (AND it was only $20). I’ll explain more about Johnny Cupcakes later, but here’s what the glorious t-shirt looks like:
Checking Account: $693.23
Money Added to Savings: $425 (yay holidays!)
Merit Scholarship Awarded to Yours Truly: $3000
Days Until Rent is Due: 2
Money Owed to Me: $250 for my supreme papers
Things to Do:
Meet with professor on Tuesday to schedule classes
Sit by phone and pray for an interview with District Manager of Chi Chi
Get car repaired
Clean room, bathroom, and kitchen